Taking baby steps.

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Just keep going. Keep taking baby steps towards your goal. Take advantage of any opportunities to pave your path.

These are some of my favorite personal sayings I like to repeat to myself when I am dealing with a tough time on my journey. I’ve been reflecting a lot lately realizing that my first year anniversary is quickly approaching next month and how much progress I’ve made and the goals I still strive to achieve. Also with starting my next round of classes in the RVT program, I am interested to see how I will enjoy these classes. I am also hoping to gain more experience and become a Technician and just be more confident at my job.

Why take baby steps, you may ask? Why not leaps and bounds? I have been there, done that. From personal experience I have noticed when you don’t put your full effort into something and use hard work and dedication while making progress, the bounty is never as fulfilled as you expect it to be. Plus, if you have set backs it won’t seem as troublesome and painful if you keep making some kind, any kind of, progress forward toward your goal. Trust me, I am not diminishing the pain from a set back. I, personally, am a dweller and will automatically blame myself on a set back, even though sometimes these things are not within our control. I’ve tried for so long to break this habitual pattern of degrading myself and truly being my own worst critic. It doesn’t stop me from wanting to achieve my goals though, it pushes me.

For majority of my life I have been involved in competition. I felt this truly honed my technique for patience and dedication to working hard toward my goals. Whether it was an individual, or team effort, I learned at a young age when you place hard work into something, it always paid off. The endless practices with riding my horse, practicing my instrument, running, conditioning, the “blood, sweat and TEARS”, etc. I wasn’t always first place either, but when I did win it made the victory so much more appreciated.

I know my fears and ill-confidence in my new career is do to me wanting to do things right, and I hate messing up. Also to impress my peers. I need to get over it, and just do me. I know it will come to that point, but I don’t know I can’t shake these feelings sometimes. I guess it’s just I know I want to do a good job, and I just get so frustrated with myself that it gets in the way of just “getting over it”. I know it will come with time.

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